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The Camp where "getting baked" has a variety of interpretations.

STORE SPECIALS

AM I AT NORTHAVEN OR AM I AT THE MALL?

Throughout the season, Velma has various opportunisitic buys that can happen at any time and of course, only available while supplies last. Check out this page occasionally or stop by "the store"  and see what she has new.


"TIRED OF SHOPPING AT "THE GAP FOR LOSERS”

We have a new selection of Northaven T-shirts at the store. 
Bring money and your wife’s size. We will help you do the right thing.


MORE THAN ONE WAY TO MESS IT UP..ONE MIGHT BE WORTH IT !


IN THE STORE AND LOTS OF COLORS

HEY.... IF YOU DON'T LIKE THESE CAMEL TOES, YOU AIN'T SHIITE!



DID THAT LAST ALLIGATOR DANCE SATURDAY NIGHT LEAVE YOU A LITTLE BUMPED UP?

NORTHAVEN DANCE PADS!
RENT TO OWN IN THE STORE!

Endorsed by Merri Beth


PUTTIN' THE "YUM" IN BUBBLE YUM!
Just in... Breast Enhancement Chewing Gum!!
As seen on TV !  
Get some Bazooka for your Bazookas!  Double D-Licious and Double your Pleasure, double your fun.
Stop by the store. CHECK OUT OUR RACK and get a mouthful!
(recommended by five out of five dentists)


NEW THIS WEEKEND.... SO THE GUM WORKED HUH?
We now have the NEW Apple Computer chip for your "girls" that can actually
store and play music in your breast.
"The iBOOB"

This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always
complaining about men
staring at their breasts and not listening to them.
Only $499.00  
Endorsed by Merri Beth


NEW AT "the store"
Velma just got in a whole case of
"SLIM FAST AND TEQUILA" 
Not only can you get drunk, but you can lose weight too.  This introduction is the first of "dual purpose" items at the store this year. 
We expect the combo, SALAD DRESSING/SUN BLOCK to be a big seller.


JESSIE, JIM, JOHN, JACK, JOAN, JENNIFER, JILL--CHECK THIS OUT!

We just got in a supply of close outs from the recently bankrupt, "Letter J-Only Monogram Shop"

If you have any other initial, Velma has a new selection of "Northaven Resort" shirts and hats at some great prices.



Hurry!! Velma has gotten a new shipment of anatomically correct gingerbread men.
Also, if the goldfish crackers you bought last week taste like real goldfish, bring them back, they were meant to go in the pet section.


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